Counting the Years

Today, October 26th is our wedding anniversary. It is also marks one full year of writing this blog.

This blog would have never happened without my husband. He suggested I take a "Gap Year" which allowed me the time to find my passion for writing. He was the main character in my first post. He continues to encourage me to write.

Here is what I have written for him to mark the years he has put up with me.

Counting the Years

As we count year after year
The many smiles and an occasional tear
The times we felt that things were in serious tatters
It's what lies deep in our hearts that really matters

We have experienced a lot and have more to still learn
That constant smile in your eyes still makes my heart yearn
We have found a way to rise above
At the very core is great respect and love

We have so much and we have made it so far
We never forget just how lucky we are
To have all that we have there is no disguise
We both know we've been given the ultimate prize

We are the fabulous five it's true and it's real
Our family is our passion it's just how we feel
It's a life on the go and it's crazy sometimes
But really we know these are the best of times

We would do it all again in a minute no doubt
You hold in your heart what I can't live without
These past 21 years have been special you see
I can see now so clearly what real love can be

Happy Anniversary!
Magda

Driving 101

I am in the midst of teaching our 16 year old son how to drive. I will break down this sentence to give a mental picture of how this is going so far.

I  - Me. A Middle Aged, Menopausal (or as I like to say Mental-Pausal)Women, who at any given time could be described as - Itchy, Bitchy, Sweaty, Sleepy, Bloated, Forgetful and Psycho (Emphasis on the silent P)

Am in the Midst Of - Daringly putting my life into the hands of a boy who cannot find both shoes in the morning.

Teaching - Banging on the dashboard screaming my head off as my life flashes before me.

Our - The use of this pronoun is merely a formality out of respect to the child's father but in reality whenever my husband asks me how the driving is going I respond with, "I think YOUR son is secretly trying to take me down."

16 Year Old Son - Anyone living with or having lived through the experience of having one of these Beings in their presence knows that they are Omnipotent and therefore are not apt to taking instruction well from a person they deem as completely incompetent.

How To - How can you teach a human "How To" do anything when they already know everything - "I KNOW MOM, GEEZ, WHAT DO YOU THINK I AM, I MEAN YOU HAVE ALREADY TOLD ME 100 TIMES TO SLOW DOWN." (Standard response, "If you already know then why are you still DRIVING TOO FAST?")

Drive - The Control and Operation of a Motor Vehicle (while a woman who used to cut the crust off your bread and still does all your laundry has turned into a raving lunatic)

Next Week : It's called a Blinker, Use It!

Buckle Up!
Magda

Time

In our kitchen hangs a perpetual calendar that our family has had for 18 years. I remember the day I ordered it from LL Bean. I was so happy. I had admired a beautiful handmade perpetual calendar my mother in law has in her kitchen. I was excited to find something like it, albeit mass produced, and remember the first time I hung it in our home - three homes ago. For some reason I have a connection to this calendar. It is almost as if it holds in it the passing of time for me and my family.

I rarely remember to change the month on the first day - case in point it is the 5th of the month and I just changed it over. I always have the same feeling when I move the tiles for the number of days, pictures for special occasions, etc.. into a new month. The feeling of a new beginning. I rarely feel sad that time passes along. I usually feel a sense of wonder. I reflect on the events that have occurred the month prior, look at the pictures that coincide with specific holidays and then wonder at how the new month will proceed. I have found myself marking big events in history on this calendar. After 9/11 I used the American Flag Tile at the end of each month as a way to remember. I realize I stopped doing this a few months ago. Maybe I stopped because somewhere in my own self I didn't need the visual reminder anymore. This memory has simply become part of the fabric of who I am now - to remember to be grateful every day because it can be taken away at any time.

After my mom died I started using a new tile on the 28th of every month to remember the day she died and to have a way to mark the time that has passed. The tile is a red rose with a red, white, and blue swag around it - this tile is supposed to be used for Memorial Day. And, I guess, that's what I am using it for - as a memory.

I asked myself today why? Why in the world am I doing this? First of all I recognize my gut is telling me to, it's an instinctual act, just like with the American flag tile after 9/11. But again, the question persists, why? I think I am doing this not to remember that my mom died, the hole in my heart reminds me of that every day. I think I am doing it to remind me that my mom lived. And in doing so I want to remember how my mom lived. I want to remember that she rarely, if ever, compromised her beliefs and that she loved unconditionally. She was so many things and did so many things that I feel it is important to find a way to hold on to her strength any way I can, which even includes this quirky way, especially as time passes along. My mom loved life and wanted to be a part of it as long as she could. I believe this act helps me remember.

One of my mom's favorite poets was Rod McKuen. He wrote a poem, Pushing the Clouds Away. Here is part of that poem. Funny, I have never read this poem before today, but for some reason I can hear my mom saying these words to me, time after time.

Golden Gate Bridge in Clouds
Courtesy of National Geographic

I have been going a long time now
and along the way I have learned some things.
You have to make the good times yourself.
Take the little times and make them into big times.
Save the times that are alright for the ones that aren't so good.

Well I'll admit.....
I have never been able to push the clouds away by myself. 
Help me, please.

And she always did, every time.

Magda

Stop Messing with My Broccoli

I have really been wanting to write a post about food.

Since I am not a foodie or a cook I knew it would be a hard sell.  I cook food of course, just not very well. Today while I was preparing another nondescript meal for my wonderful family of tolerant and non fussy eaters I arrived at the last straw place - or maybe it was an AHA moment - my Oprah and Dr. Phil wires are crossed. What ever the term is for the place I reached I got there when I realized that I am being gypped out of perfectly mediocre food to feed my wonderful tolerant family of non fussy eaters

I am starting to notice that for the same price I am getting less food!

Yes, it's true. My package of Keebler Cookies has less elves!

My box of Store Brand (shh - don't tell the kids) Granola bars, while having the same number of bars and touting only 90 calories per serving, is really only 90 calories because the bars are smaller!

My box of Family Size Mac N Cheese no longer feeds my family! Well this could be because two members of my family are teenage boys who eat EVERYTHING, but still!

And now today my package of frozen, microwave in the bag, broccoli has less florets!

As Charlie Brown would say, AAUGH.

I guess the upside is with this less food epidemic I can probably, finally, loose weight since I will be eating less, well, food.

But of course, so far, that's the one thing I haven't seen any less of - go figure!
Magda