Life is full of stages or shifts. Almost from the day we are born we are shifting. Most shifts are easy going natural occurrences experienced without too much upheaval. We learn to become independent creatures in our youth. We shift away from our families towards our friends. We begin to make decisions on our own and learn to take ownership of the good and the bad, to deal with the consequences and move on hopefully changed from the knowledge of our experiences. We shift towards responsibility of a world bigger than our own myopic views and begin to see things on a more global level. These shifts usually rank low on the Richter Scale.
Then there are the shifts that are larger in scale: Moves, Job Changes, Marriage, Divorce, Sicknesses, Births and Deaths. These shifts happen and they can bring the house down. They are the shifts that require a different kind of inner strength. They mess with our equilibrium. Everything we have known shifts in such a way that we need to almost rebuild as a new person, a new neighbor, a new wife, a new mother. These shifts are exciting and celebrated.
When the shift is a loss the life we move into is also new, not a new life of our choosing all the time but a new life just the same. From this unasked for newness can come strength. Rebuilding oneself with the strength of the love of someone lost can make the shift easier. It's a day by day process of rebuilding and with any hope when shift happens again we'll be ready.
Magda
Monday, March 26, 2012
Sunday, March 11, 2012
Simple Words of Comfort
In times of personal struggles most of us turn to family and friends for comfort, support, counsel, relief. It can be hard to open up and share intimate personal details because it puts us in a state of vulnerability. Some people soldier on alone - bearing their struggles in solitude. The course is personal preference, neither one being right or wrong, just personal.
I am the kind of person who looks to others to help me through hard times. This week has been especially hard. My sisters and I have been faced with the decline in health of our beloved mother. We have been brave and supportive. Each of us different and our reaction to our circumstance has been varied. The emotional toll has been great.
During this time I have found simple words of comfort have had the greatest impact. Simple words of comfort are the best. They have been delivered by those close to me and by random people I have encountered during the weeks journey - the young nurse who selflessly cared for my mom and who spoke gently to us and to our mom as she administered to her needs. The woman in the elevator who simply said, "I hope whoever you are visiting is at peace." These encounters along with the many conversations I have had over the course of the week have made me remember the great impact our words have on others, on each other.
The words we choose to use are powerful. At this moment it all seems so simple to me - we should strive to use our powers for good.
Sometimes, the best way to help someone is to just be near them.
Magda
I am the kind of person who looks to others to help me through hard times. This week has been especially hard. My sisters and I have been faced with the decline in health of our beloved mother. We have been brave and supportive. Each of us different and our reaction to our circumstance has been varied. The emotional toll has been great.
During this time I have found simple words of comfort have had the greatest impact. Simple words of comfort are the best. They have been delivered by those close to me and by random people I have encountered during the weeks journey - the young nurse who selflessly cared for my mom and who spoke gently to us and to our mom as she administered to her needs. The woman in the elevator who simply said, "I hope whoever you are visiting is at peace." These encounters along with the many conversations I have had over the course of the week have made me remember the great impact our words have on others, on each other.
The words we choose to use are powerful. At this moment it all seems so simple to me - we should strive to use our powers for good.
Sometimes, the best way to help someone is to just be near them.
Magda
Saturday, March 3, 2012
Things I have Found on the Dining Room Table
Living with teenagers is a daily adventure. This is not breaking news to anyone who is experiencing or has experienced this wonderful(bit of sarcasm) time in parenting.
My latest trial, and possibly obsession, is surrounded by the things I have found on the dining room table. I share this list hoping not to be judged by my house cleaning abilities or lack there of, but rather by my constant attempt at trying to teach my children to pick up after themselves.
Here are some of my favorite finds:
An algebra book, calculator, and yesterday's homework (done but still not turned in)
One sock
Forever 21 shopping bag
An assortment of mechanical pencils - all out of lead
Store receipt for mechanical pencils - not for more lead
Syrup from LAST Saturday's pancake breakfast - phew, now I can stop looking for it in the cupboard
Q-tips - I won't divulge whether they are used or not at the risk of embarrassing anyone BUT I can tell you they were not mine
Banana Peel found under the newspaper - won't tell you what the date is on the paper
Three cellphones - two keep pinging and one is dead
Three laptops
Two cellphone chargers - explaining earlier item on the list
The dogs leash - no one can tell me for certain if he has actually been walked
A dirty cereal bowl from I have no idea when BUT I am not clearing it because this is not a restaurant or a hotel and I am not the hired help, clearly....
Is it 5:00 yet?
Magda
My latest trial, and possibly obsession, is surrounded by the things I have found on the dining room table. I share this list hoping not to be judged by my house cleaning abilities or lack there of, but rather by my constant attempt at trying to teach my children to pick up after themselves.
Here are some of my favorite finds:
An algebra book, calculator, and yesterday's homework (done but still not turned in)
One sock
Forever 21 shopping bag
An assortment of mechanical pencils - all out of lead
Store receipt for mechanical pencils - not for more lead
Syrup from LAST Saturday's pancake breakfast - phew, now I can stop looking for it in the cupboard
Q-tips - I won't divulge whether they are used or not at the risk of embarrassing anyone BUT I can tell you they were not mine
Banana Peel found under the newspaper - won't tell you what the date is on the paper
Three cellphones - two keep pinging and one is dead
Three laptops
Two cellphone chargers - explaining earlier item on the list
The dogs leash - no one can tell me for certain if he has actually been walked
A dirty cereal bowl from I have no idea when BUT I am not clearing it because this is not a restaurant or a hotel and I am not the hired help, clearly....
Is it 5:00 yet?
Magda
Tuesday, February 21, 2012
Forty Days of Smiles
Today, February 21st, marks the day that humorist Erma Bombeck was born. This year February 21st is Fat/Shrove Tuesday. Coincidence? Probably yes, but for me it is more like Divine Intervention. Yes, the idea seems crazy and silly - well maybe yes but then again maybe no.
In my faith for the next forty days I should be giving something up to show my understanding of the sacrifices made for me. I always fail miserably at the giving up part which just makes me feel really bad during this time of reflection. I end up reflecting on what a big failure I am because I cannot go 40 days without cookies, chocolate, candy, or yelling at my kids! Some years ago I changed my tactic and decided I would spend forty days giving to others rather than giving up something for myself.
At church this Sunday I was reminded of being open to give of yourself rather than restricting yourself. I have always believed God has a keen sense of humor - this explains a lot of things if you think about it and if you just open yourself up to looking at things differently. Since I try to find humor in most things in life, for the next 40days I plan on trying to do things that make people smile and maybe even laugh. I plan on just plain smiling at a lot of people.
Erma Bombeck once wrote, " When I stand before God at the end of my life I would hope that I would not have a single talent left, and could say, 'I used everything you gave me'." Personally, I am not sure what all my talents are and if I am using them all the time. I do know that I am a talented smiler. I love to smile and usually smile at times that are appropriate and even some inappropriate times, the awkward gift of the nervous smile.
My hope is that for the next forty days I can make other people smile by sharing my smile with others. The possibilities of success are endless and I can not think of a better way to celebrate the life of those who make and have made us smile and most of all to honor the One who gave us our talents.
Peace begins with a smile,
Magda
In my faith for the next forty days I should be giving something up to show my understanding of the sacrifices made for me. I always fail miserably at the giving up part which just makes me feel really bad during this time of reflection. I end up reflecting on what a big failure I am because I cannot go 40 days without cookies, chocolate, candy, or yelling at my kids! Some years ago I changed my tactic and decided I would spend forty days giving to others rather than giving up something for myself.
At church this Sunday I was reminded of being open to give of yourself rather than restricting yourself. I have always believed God has a keen sense of humor - this explains a lot of things if you think about it and if you just open yourself up to looking at things differently. Since I try to find humor in most things in life, for the next 40days I plan on trying to do things that make people smile and maybe even laugh. I plan on just plain smiling at a lot of people.
Erma Bombeck once wrote, " When I stand before God at the end of my life I would hope that I would not have a single talent left, and could say, 'I used everything you gave me'." Personally, I am not sure what all my talents are and if I am using them all the time. I do know that I am a talented smiler. I love to smile and usually smile at times that are appropriate and even some inappropriate times, the awkward gift of the nervous smile.
My hope is that for the next forty days I can make other people smile by sharing my smile with others. The possibilities of success are endless and I can not think of a better way to celebrate the life of those who make and have made us smile and most of all to honor the One who gave us our talents.
Peace begins with a smile,
Magda
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