Happy Birthday Mom

Today, on what would have been her 92nd birthday, I celebrate my mother. Yes I mourn her. I grieve her loss. Every day I thank God she was my mom.

My mother is my inspiration. She was a realist. She saw many things in her life. She saw pure joy and pure hatred. She was a true patriot and lived an authentic life. She wanted to be remembered for her choice to live life as a person who was loyal and supportive. She fought for justice, always took care of people, and our home was always open to our friends and to anyone who could not be with their own families - especially around the holidays.

She was brilliant. A gene, that sadly, I did not inherit. She loved to laugh. Something I did not see much when I was a teenager and I am confident my own teenage children know how that feels. She taught me to look at the big picture, a gift I try to work on every day.

In her early years she wanted to be a journalist and figured out a way to achieve her goal. At the end of World War II, right before the Communists took over Poland, she boarded a train by herself and left her beloved family and country to save her life and hope for a better tomorrow. Eventually she landed in the United States of America and gave us all the gift of Life, Liberty, and the Pursuit of Happiness. It was decades before she was able to return to Poland - to the family and land she loved. She gave everything she had to her four daughters. How lucky we were.

At the end of my mom's life she had dementia. All of her gifts, among them writing, painting, broadcasting, sadly taken away from her. My hope was always that the awful memories of life in Nazi occupied Poland as well as the pain of not seeing her parents, sisters, and brother were also taken away.

In the simplicity of dementia my mother remained a warm, gracious, and loving woman who up and until the end of her life she taught me what it meant to be really, really brave.

As I do every day, but especially today, I celebrate the remarkable woman named Roza Fredericka Nowotarska Kobylinska and all the wonderful gifts she taught me.

Love you mom and Happy Birthday (Sto' Lat).
Magda

Protection

If you look at my Profile you will find out that I am a teacher.

Being a teacher my heart is broken.
Being a teacher I can only imagine what the teachers at Sandy Hook Elementary School felt when their students, who they were hired to protect, were under attack.
Being a teacher means that for the time you are at school you protect the lives of everyone in your classroom - in your school. It's a community within a community within a community.

You may not always get along with your child's teacher.
You may not always get along with the teacher across the hall from you or in the other building.
You may not always see the face of God in the children who are in your classroom or the adults down the hall - but it's there.

If you look at my profile you will find out that I am a parent.

Being a parent my heart is broken.
Being a parent I can only imagine what the parents in Newtown Connecticut felt when they heard the news that their children's school was under attack.
Being a parent means for the time your children are at school you hope they are being educated and protected by people who dedicate their lives to your children.

As a parent and a teacher I am in awe of the brave acts performed by the teachers and administrators at Sandy Hook Elementary School, as well as how brave the children must have been.

If you are a parent or a teacher next time you sit across from one another start your conversations knowing that you both have the best interest of the child in your heart and that if ever under attack both of you would do anything to offer them protection.

Magda

Twas the Week Before Christmas

It's the week before Christmas. Oh crap! Are you Kidding!

The decorations, the presents, the menu - Get Up! Stop Sitting!

We need to get to the attic, to the woods, to the store!

Yes it needs to be done - plus the wreath for the door!

The children keep asking, "What's the matter?, they say.

"Have you forgotten in a week it will be Christmas Day?"

What will we tell them if we don't manage to get it all done?

"So sorry kids this year Christmas will stink, there's to be no more fun?"

The neighbor's lawn, have you seen it? There are so many lights

When did that happen? When did they? How many nights?

On their windows are bows. On ours? Heaven knows!

We are so behind! So behind! From our heads to our toes.

Where do we start? Should we make a list and a plan?

Or maybe we just book a trip to Japan.

No, that won't do we really need to get ready,

If we don't Christmas dinner will be a pot of spaghetti!

We could start with the presents. Do we know what they want?

And for whom should we buy for, your brother, my aunt?

And the kids, yes the kids, we could get them some games.

For the XBox and Wii - but I don't know the names.

To the stores I will travel. To the stores I will go.

How many to visit I really don't know.

To Target, To Nordstrom, To Macy's, and Old Navy Too!

To the Gap, and to Starbucks, and to the Little House Blue!

To the mall I will go and drive around and around.

Where there will not be a parking spot in the lot to be found!

To the computer I'll try that - now we're really in trouble!

To get it by Christmas we'll have to pay double!

Now go get the tree. Yes, the tree. You can do it!

Please remember the size. Yes, the size. We need one that will fit!

When it comes home let's remember putting it up can be fun.

No screaming, no shouting, or the kids they will run!

Christmas Card picture? Is that what you said?

There's no chance that we have one without eyes that are red!

Get everyone together. We can try one more time.

Matching shirts? Are you joking? It can't be a crime!

Time to go to the attic and get all the stuff.

Unwrap all the bulbs. Give the fake wreath a good fluff.

Wait, what's that in that box? The one over there?

Is that the Santa pillow that goes in the rocking chair?

This week will be crazy! Yes, we've done it again!

Last year we swore we would remember the pain!

We promised to be organized. Not to wait till the last minute!

The chance of that really happening is like the lottery - and we win it!

We'll make it. We'll pull it together. We will!

We'll even be happy until we see the credit card bill!

We'll worry about that later. It may take all year to get over our blight.

For now Happy Christmas to all , and to all a Good Night!

Ho, Ho, HO!
Magda

The Fine Art of Saying No

It has been awhile since I have had the time to write a blog post. It's because it has been awhile since I have had the time to form a complete thought.  Maybe you are familiar with the line in the holiday song, "Deck the Halls"..."Tis' the Season to Be Jolly" HA! Tis' the Season to be Busy!

There is a good possibility that I am not busier than anyone else this time of year. It's the extra added things I have said "Yes" to that have made the past month CRAZY! It is completely possible I am addicted to saying "Yes, sure, I will do that, happy to help." I may in fact be a serial volunteer.

People volunteer for all sorts of reasons:  To give something back to their community, To help others, For Personal Growth, For new and unique experiences, or because when asked they simply cannot say NO. That's me.

19th Century American Humorist Henry Wheeler Shaw, who wrote under the pen name Josh Billings,
once said,

"Half of the troubles of this life can be traced to saying yes too quickly and not saying no soon enough." 

The saying yes thing is the pressure I put on myself. The need to please people maybe, or the desire to not be judged if I simply say, "No". Is it really okay to say no, even if a part of you is going to feel guilty for not helping out? The answer is YES!

I am realizing that just maybe there is truth in the following:

• It's okay to say NO if you would rather relax than go out.
• It's okay to say NO if helping someone else out means you will sacrifice your own needs.
• It's okay to say NO because you don't have the time, even if you don't know right at this moment that whether you will or will not be available in the future.
• It's okay to say NO even if you do not have a detailed excuse. Even if you think you should give one.
• It's even okay to say NO after you have said yes. Especially if you realize you were not being true to yourself.

So starting today I will be practicing the fine art of saying, "NO". Right after I finish helping out with the tea at my daughter's school, give out all the swim team clothing, buy the snacks for next week's meet, and feed my vacationing neighbor's cat.

Fa la la la la,

Magda